5 WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR SELF-LOVE

"There is a Divine and Infinite potential within every soul, an intimate access to the mind of God and the passion of the Universe."
~ K. Allen Kay

"I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being."
~ Hafiz

"To be beautiful means to be yourself.  You don't need to be accepted by others.  You need to accept yourself."
~ Thich Nhat Hanh

Improving one's self-esteem takes great determination and effort initially, but it gets easier and easier, and before you know it, you will be living the life that you deserve. It is well worth the effort.

"We are each gifted in a unique and important way.  It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light."
~ Mary Dunbar

"When people believe in themselves, they have the first secret of success."
~ Norman Vincent Peale

"Yours is the energy that makes your world.  There are no limitations to the self, except those you believe in."
~ Jane Roberts

What is self-esteem?

Self-esteem consists of many concepts of the self, but mainly one's self-respect, self-confidence and self-worth.   It comes from the inner belief of oneself and not the egoistic feeling of superiority.  In fact, we all possess an inferiority complex, some to more of a degree than others, which we try to hide by making ourselves seem superior to others.  This is of the ego, and not of an inner belief.

Self-respect is the respect one shows oneself by having one's needs met.  The ability to assertively say no, when something is not beneficial to us.  Taking care of one's body and mind correctly by exercising, eating correctly, adequate rest, and stimulating the mind, etc.   By not allowing others to use or abuse us.

Self-confidence is the feeling of being content and accepting of the way that one looks and appears to others. This, however, does not depend on what others say or think about one, but rather how one perceives oneself in this reality, irrelevant of compliments or criticism.  Princess Diana was a perfect example of someone with healthy self-confidence.  Possessing good self-confidence does not, however, mean that one has good self-esteem.

Self-worth is a sense of feeling worthy of ones values and beliefs.  If a person has good values and stands up for these values, no matter what, they feel worthy of the beliefs they have about themselves.   To have good values, but to crack under strain, and give in to the beliefs of others is to not feel that ones values and beliefs are worthy.

Healthy self-esteem is a combination of these three, and many more, within the eight different areas of our lives.  The different areas are:  Health; wealth; family and friends;  playtime, hobbies and fun;  relationships;  career or job;  personal space;  contribution/spirituality.

Some people may have great self-esteem within their work life, but struggle in their relationships with others, for example.  The idea is to have a balance of good self-esteem in all the areas.

How do I improve my self-esteem?

Do these exercises consistently and with determination:

• The first thing you need to do is straighten up that body of yours to match the new and confident you. 

Push your shoulders back and down; pull your abdomen and buttocks in. Pull your neck and chin in. 

(Much like those horses that do dressage... have you noticed how regal they look?) Do it now! Feel how important and good you feel about yourself already. Make a determined effort to keep your body straight at all times. If you lapse and forget, no problem, just straighten up again and feel the difference.

Remember, if you look like a ball... people will kick you. If you look like a question mark... people will question everything you say.

• Recognise your negative self-talk monster. 

You know, the one that keeps telling you that you look too fat, or too ugly, or that you will fail at everything you do. Become aware of and write down what he/she says. Immediately change his/her words to a positive affirmation regarding the subject at hand. Eg. You may say 'I am successful at everything I do.' 

(Remember that Thomas Edison went through 10,000 ways to invent the light bulb before he found the one that worked).

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

~ Thomas A. Edison

• Surround yourself with positive people and positive things. 

Read inspirational quotes and affirmations. Watch inspirational videos and attend motivational talks. There is more free material on the the internet than you could ever get through. You may want to join my page on Facebook: 

http://www.facebook.com/LIFEMATTERSPERSONALLIFECOACHING

Spend time in nature. Perceiving the beauty around you helps you to see the beauty within you.

• Make a list of your positive attributes; your achievements; your talents; and even the compliments.

Stand in front of a mirror and read this list aloud, as if you really believe these affirmations to be true. If it feels funny, laugh... It will put you in a positive mindset and help you to attract more positivity into your life. Do this every morning and evening, or more often, if you can.  If it feels like a lie, don't worry... with enough determination and will, it will soon become the truth.

• Make a list of all the things you are grateful for.

(Take into consideration the fact that there are many people who don't have a roof over their heads or even a little food to eat.) Read this list every morning and during the day, whenever you feel stressed or negative.  Being appreciative of the things around us helps us to become more appreciative of ourselves.  

Your results will be determined by the effort you exert and the will to succeed.

Please join my blog and let me know what other subjects you would like me to cover.  Questions and emails are welcome.

         

Love, light and abundance ♥